The First.

My first trimester was... interesting. And fast! (Probably because I didn't find out I was expecting until it was half over.)

But even with one-third of my pregnancy behind me... I still don't feel "pregnant."

With a grandmother, mother, and 4 sisters who all suffered from morning sickness (some so severe they were on bed-rest)... I should inevitably have morning sickness. Right? Plus, everyone has seen the movies. The first sign that says your pregnant = puking in toilet.

Well I haven't thrown up once. I've never even felt nauseous...

In the beginning, this terrified me. I read online that this means I should expect the worst: a miscarriage. I never pictured myself wishing for morning sickness. But they say if you have it... you'll most likely deliver a healthy baby. 

But that's the problem with reading a million blogs, articles, forums, books, pamphlets.... you get so much stuff in your head that you aren't really sure what's opinion, what's fact, and what should or shouldn't be happening to your body right now. It's scary for a first-timer.

But the one thing I keep reminding myself is this: There's no such thing as a "normal" pregnancy. That's comforting.

And I have had a few symptoms...

• Selective appetite: I hate hamburgers, french fries, and sweets (ice cream, chocolate, candy, cake, cookies, doughnuts, etc.) On the other hand, I'm loving raw vegetables, Olive Garden salad dressing, fruits, cheese, milk, Ramen noodles, fish, blue Gatorade, and the rectangle pizza I got on Fridays in elementary school. 
• 4am insomnia
• Burping
• Getting teary-eyed when your husband's football team scores a touchdown
• Forgetfulness
• Mid-afternoon sleepiness
• Mini cramps when I sneeze or laugh
• Inability to focus
• Breathlessness after walking up one flight of stairs
• Hunger (as in, middle of the night, spur of the moment, I'm a grizzly bear who just woke up from hibernation and will kill/eat anything and everything in my path)

Speaking of grizzly bears... I must add ZERO patience or tolerance for ANYONE OR ANYTHING. (Sometimes I just HATE people.) This is the hardest one to handle. After the rage passes, I feel like such an awful person. But at the same time, I can only think of one thing to justify my feelings... the pregnancy card. It all started when I was about 7 or 8 weeks pregnant, so I HAVE to attribute it to the surge of hormones that have taken over my body. 

I've heard of people hating their husbands... and lucky for mine, he's exempt from my strange feelings. I actually think he got the opposite end of the deal, because I seem to be loving him extra. 

But anyway... let's just say, even though I don't always feel like there's a baby inside of me, I DO feel like a stranger in my own body (and mind). And it's weird. 

Let's just hope someday, my true self finds a way back. Because seriously... the road rage is getting dangerous.